1/ LEGAL BLOOD ALCOHOL LIMIT TO BE RAISED
With only 1000 road deaths a year in Australia, most not even alcohol-related, there is spare hospital capacity to deal with alcohol-related accidents. A legal limit of 0.05g/100ml is an unacceptable infringement on the right to enjoyment https://t.co/5N55jcUCJi
2/ The legal blood alcohol limit is therefore to be raised progressively until hospital capacity to deal with alcohol-related motor vehicle accidents is reached. The increase will be 0.03g/100ml per month. This is a proportionate and cautious response, allowing society to adjust.
3/ A slow increase like this will allow those most at risk to take measures to protect themselves. It will allow overweight pedestrians the opportunity to lose weight. The blind will have the time to acquire assistance dogs. Those car drivers particularly anxious will be able...
4/ ... to purchase safer cars as road casualties gradually increase. Excess spending on road safety campaigns will cease and onerous safety regulations will be repealed for car manufacturers, freeing up industry from excessive cost and government interference.
5/ The increase in road accidents can be expected to have a knock on effect on hospital staff themselves, who will be injured and killed in greater numbers. Plans are in hand, however, to increase supply of healthcare staff from overseas to ensure services are not unduly affected
6/ Deaths related to drink driving will be reclassified into those "from" and "with". A death "from" will be one which could not reasonably be expected to have been avoided. An example of a death "with" would be an elderly person who could have been expected to walk faster...
7/ ...on a pedestrian crossing, but didn't. Or a big fattie who gets hit on a crossing, who had the opportunity to lose weight, but didn't. Another death "with" would be a driver with adequate reflex reactions for normal driving, but not fast enough to deal with drunk drivers.
8/ "A return to sanity at last!" Said Bob Knockemabout of the Australian Pub and Hospitality Association. "This madness has gone on for too long. The targeting of zero road deaths was the nanny state gone mad. Shit happens, bro, d'ye get me? Mine's a quadruple Jack Daniels."
9/ Dr Anthea Lilyliver of the AMA said: "Of course we support a proportionate response, though remain concerned about the impact on health services. We urge a gradual increase in the legal blood alcohol limit with frequent reappraisal as further data emerges."
10/ Professor Angela Talkinghead of the University of Sunshine said: "With a gradual increase in the legal limit we can expect drivers to improve their skills at driving while drunk. This is part of the transition to "living with pissheads at the wheel". The road will be...
11/ ... a little bit bumpy at first, which is only to be expected, but casualty rates will soon drop."
Dr Anthony Runfaster, newly appointed CHO of the state of Redneckland, said it is "necessary and critical" that as many people started driving drunk as possible...
12/ ..."within the next few months". He went on to thank younger drivers for their assistance and encouraged them to "have a drink, have a drive, go out and see what you can find".
Police Commissioner Phil Maboots said: "We will be withdrawing Random Breath Testing first...
13/ ...followed by all breath alcohol testing within the next few months as we transition to living with Safer Drink Driving."
The Health Minister, Mr Alan Givemeajobwhenileavepolitics, said: "As part of our transition to "Living with pissheads at the wheel"...
14/ ..we will stop announcing the numbers of drunk drivers caught unless there has been an actual death. Deaths are the only metric that matters and as long as they are kept within acceptable limits we can go on as normal. This is about personal responsibility. If you don't...
15/ ...want to get hit by a drunk driver, then you are entirely at liberty to take steps yourself to try and prevent it as best you can. People want government out of their lives."
16/ "You guys are completely cooked. Show us the evidence this is the right thing to do. You're gambling with the lives of ordinary people at the highest possible stakes. Why?" Said no journalist ever at the press conference to announce these new measures.
17/ Editor's Note. 1077 Australians have died of COVID in the last 15 days. That is the same as the 2020 road death toll (1095) and twice the number of Australians who died in the Vietnam War (521).
18/ Editor's Note 2. This thread isn't as crazy as it looks. We actually do do this for alcohol. Not 2 weeks ago, the pub owners in Kununurra, Western Australia, were up in arms about short-term alcohol restrictions due to hospital staff shortages. 👇
https://t.co/tqyyvsOKJL
19/ Editor's Note 3. In 1967, Barbara Castle introduced the first drink driving laws in the UK.
Interviewer: “Minister, this is a rotten idea, you’re really spoiling my fun as a motorist so minister, what’s the idea behind it?
👇
https://t.co/4TkyZf0F1p https://t.co/0rMLugLsuY
