My grandma birthed 12 children by the age 32. Until she was in her 20’s, women couldn’t legally open a bank account. Where was she going with all those kids and no job? That’s without even getting into the societal stigma of single motherhood back then. Staying wasn’t a choice. https://t.co/Mu1MrgdRwo

She was married for over 30 years until he died. Many would applaud such a long lasting relationship. I know better. She stayed because she was trapped, and she was scared of what he’d do if she even tried to leave. Abuse like that changes a person. It isn’t something to applaud.

I often think about how hard single motherhood can feel for me as a mum of one child in 2021 with choices and an income of my own. How impossible it would have been to flee an abusive marriage with over 10 kids, no income, and nowhere near the support systems we have today.

When my grandma was dying, she requested not to be buried with my grandad. She’d have nightmares that he was trying to pull her to him in the afterlife and made me promise that she wouldn’t go with him. Her decades long marriage is far from something to aspire to.

I have endless compassion for my grandma and all that she endured. She died when I was 17. Now as a mother in her 30s, I have such a deeper appreciation for what she went through. Endless love for all those women like my grandma who lived through that time with zero choices.